This week’s post has been a real struggle. Obviously – it’s four days late.
Not because of the content or the focus, but because of the lack thereof. Don’t misunderstand, I have a page full of future topic ideas and I’ve started writing a post for this week several times, but every time felt forced. So I stopped.
I knew when I started this project of a-blog-post-a-week that there was a small danger. It could become a source of further unease and tension for me, if I held to my intention of a post a week too strongly.
The intention is to keep me focused on finding balance, peace and stillness throughout this year despite the distractions of everyday life, work and everything else. It’s working surprisingly well, and I am really enjoying writing each week. I love that sense of ideas flowing together like a stream. It’s often helpful putting my ideas into a structured, coherent form instead of rumbling around in my head. Most of the time I’m writing as much to myself as I am to any “audience” reading this.
Only this week, nothing has seemed to come together and I didn’t get that “flow” feeling I’m always encouraging the young writers in my English classes to find.
Part of it has been time. It’s been a busy week and usually I allow time for ideas to coalesce together in my mind and then time to write the post. That’s been a challenge this week.
I don’t want to force a topic before it’s fully formed in my mind. I feel like I need to just wait and let my ideas germinate and grow, forming more before I write. So for now I’m sitting on my page of future topic ideas and learning to be patient.
It’s my natural inclination to want to fulfill my commitment to a post a week, but I’m learning to be patient with myself too. While I’m not really happy with this post, I’m telling myself it’s “good enough”.
I need to remind myself that this is a journey I am on, changing habits of action and of thought. And habits don’t change easily or fast. They change slowly, with constant intentional focus until they’re replaced with new habits.
There are no shortcuts.
The good news is that I am seeing change. Sometimes it’s three steps forward and two steps back – and often I’d like it to be a lot faster – but it’s progress all the same.
I’m slowing down, pursuing hobbies and listening to my body. I’m taking care of myself better. I’m learning to let go of a lot of stuff and making room for what’s important. These are all positive steps.
I’m getting lots of practice at patience, and that can only be a good thing.
The video below is part of a series of videos titled Gratitude Revealed by Louie Schwartzberg.
Feel inspired? You can visit the Gratitude Revealed website to explore the rest of the series.